Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future. Concentrate the
mind on the present moment.-Buddha
The rest is a blur. I learned to hunt, found fresh water, and lived alone. I made myself a life, with no time for running. No time for the killers to find me. No time to remember. 2 years later, I’ll still live the same way. Same food, same home, same forest, same life.
Is it boring? Would I want to stop for once? Would I want to start a pack? No. I have become a blank slate, but I know one thing. Having a family just means more loss. More sorrow. More loneliness. The killers would find us. It would turn out exact same way. Except, this time, the red fur and dull eyes would belong to me. The scared eyes watching from the bushes would be my own kin. They’d think they could survive. After all, I did. But there would be no badger to feed them. No cave to warm them. No M to save them.
This was how my life was. Eat, sleep, drink, repeat. I began to wonder why that last step exists at all. After all, I had no purpose to live anymore. I was a robot. Confined to the same thing, day and day again. And if I did have a purpose, it would all be gone by now, along with me.
I do however, stop and think once in awhile. I think about my mother. My siblings. M. It’s still very hard to believe that young, hopeful pup turned into this broken, unfeeling excuse for a wolf.
It was how my life was. Eating, drinking, sleeping, living. Until a certain thought popped into my mind one day. One that would determine my entire future.